Invest in your relationships with other people, with your children, and with your extended family members. Treat yourself to something you enjoy on occasion in order to give yourself a break from the turmoil at home. For instance, get a pedicure or enjoy a night out at the movies with friends.
Be Supportive, Not Enabling
One of the mistakes many people make is enabling their alcoholic spouses or trying to prevent consequences from occurring. Instead, it only prevents your spouse from experiencing the results of his or her actions that could eventually lead to recovery. This might be in the form of therapy, counseling, or joining support groups like Alcoholics Anonymous. It’s important to express your concerns without judgment or blame.
Financial Effects
Set Halfway house expectations for the household, such as no alcohol around children or specific times when drinking is unacceptable. Research shows that substance abuse in a relationship can intensify dissatisfaction and instability. Verbal arguments may escalate into harmful patterns, and in some cases, even physical aggression. Statements that begin with “You always…” or “You make it hard to…” are only going to make your spouse defensive.
The Effects of Living with an Alcoholic Spouse: What You Need To Know
Promises can be made – and even kept – for periods, but if you still find yourself asking if it’s okay to leave an alcoholic spouse, there has clearly been no long-term change. Alcoholism does not just affect children and spouses but siblings as well. Having a brother or sister with a drinking problem can also be very tough as you may be trying to support your sibling whilst also taking care of your own family. If you are in this position, speak to your parents, your sibling’s partner, or anyone else who may be able to help. Sharing a home with a loved one who has an alcohol use disorder (AUD) can be very difficult.
The following are options to consider when dealing with an alcoholic spouse:
- They want to do this by stating factual situations compassionately and empathetically.
- But with empathy, education, resources, and a commitment to self-care, you can foster an environment that encourages healing.
- Recognising the signs of alcohol addiction is the first step in addressing the issue.
- Giving up on an alcoholic spouse is justified when you’ve tried everything to help them, and they aren’t willing to commit, or when you can’t take care of yourself or your family anymore.
- It comprised items including the age, gender, educational status, occupational status, and other demographic information of wives of alcoholic clients.
- Coping with an alcoholic partner requires taking care of your own mental and physical health.
Understand that if you choose to stay, it means financial struggles and facing the challenge of making ends meet while dealing with a spouse who refuses to get help. Deciding to leave is hard, especially considering all the things you’ve likely been through with your spouse. It won’t be easy, and you may have second thoughts about whether it’s the right decision.
- Alcoholism is a disease requiring specialized treatment and intervention, and the longer it continues unaddressed, the more it can derail everyone’s lives.
- As the drinking problem persists, your spouse may become more violent or engage in risky behavior.
- Loving someone is not enough to sustain a marriage when the other elements are missing.
- There were 70% wives who often felt anxious owing to the drinking problem of their husbands.
- This will help make a stronger case that a spouse’s behaviors and actions are not healthy.
Additionally, I examine the way mental and physical health as well as our relationships with others impact the reasons people drink and their role in maintaining sobriety long-term. Living with an alcoholic husband or wife can test the love and strength of marriage in many ways, and speaking with your spouse may make them defensive or lose control of their emotions. When speaking to a partner about their alcohol use disorder, you should try and wait until they are sober. They are more likely to listen and understand the problems their drinking is causing in your relationship if they haven’t been drinking. If your alcoholic spouse is experiencing any of these health problems, seeking treatment may be necessary to avoid any life-threatening issues.
Questionnaire of coping strategies used by wives of alcoholic clients
A specific type of codependency can occur in children of those with AUD. Called “role reversal,” this is when a child feels responsible for their parent. This reversal of responsibilities can lead the child to develop a pattern of codependency in future relationships. Still, it is important to remember that you are in control and have options on how to handle the situation. Living with an alcoholic, especially someone who you living with an alcoholic partner are legally or financially bound to, is a complicated situation, but there can be ways to navigate this living condition and relationship.
The present descriptive study aimed to investigate the problems faced and coping strategies used by the wives of alcoholics. Alcoholism is considered as a major health as well as a social problem. Often the family members of alcoholics suffer intense psychological, physical and social trauma due to the core drinking problem of the family member. Struggling with how to stay married to an alcoholic can feel like navigating an endless tunnel. But with empathy, education, resources, and a commitment to self-care, you can foster an environment that encourages healing. Over time, alcohol misuse erodes the trust, communication, and connection that form the backbone of any marriage.
Connecting with a community of people who understand what you’re going through can give you strength and remind you that you are not alone. If you are the breadwinner of the household and you are living with a partner who is an alcoholic, you may have immense feelings of guilt and shame for wanting them to leave. You may worry that they will have no safe place to go if you kick them out, and their addiction could get worse.
If you are a spouse living with an alcoholic partner, you may rely on close friends, your therapist, family members, neighbors, or someone you met in a support group. You want to be able to trust this support system and be honest and upfront about your living situation and what you are experiencing. Children or adolescents living with an alcoholic parent have a higher risk of being abused and developing an addiction themselves. Living with an alcoholic parent can be scary, so it is important to take necessary steps and precautions to safeguard your mental health and safety. At The Recovery Village, we know how challenging it can be to cope with having an alcoholic spouse.
